Lesson Fourteen: Shafted!

            The song lyrics “What goes up must come down,” were drifting through Jon’s mind as he whistled the song Spinning Wheel by Blood, Sweat and Tears while standing in front of the school’s elevator.  The “down” button glowed a luminescent green.  Jon’s head bobbed unconsciously to the tune he was whistling as he waited for the elevator to reach him on the second floor.  Behind the elevator doors Jon could hear the muffled sounds of the elevator car rattling its way up the hoistway.  The elevator was the original one that had been installed some 25 years before when the school was built.  The building had been remodeled a couple times, but budget constraints and the limited use of the elevator had kept the district from installing a newer model.

            Jon tapped his foot while the beast behind the wall continued its slow ascent to his location.  This area of the school had three levels.  Jon waited on the second.  Growls of protest and restraint oozed through the crack between the doors sounding to Jon like some unearthly creature crawling out of the bowels of the earth.  Jon knew there was nothing wrong.  It was just the creaks and groans of an old piece of machinery.  He’d ridden it hundreds of times and so although he heard all of these sounds, his subconscious basically blocked them out.  At last the elevator chimed and the rickety doors attempted to open.  Straining as if held back by invisible hands, the doors wiggled and bumped, vibrated and creaked and finally opened…half an inch.

            “Dang it,” Jon muttered.

            This had happened a couple times before, but lately it seemed to be happening more and more.  Jon knew why.  Age.  Inserting the fingers of both of his hands into the opening to pull the doors apart, the doors suddenly closed.  Jon yelled as the pressure increased and it felt as if his fingers would snap like twigs.  Not to be beaten, Jon gave a heave and with all his might pulled his hands in opposite directions.  The doors inched open, but only about two inches.  Then they jammed.

            Jon let go.  The doors stayed open, the light from the inside beckoning him to climb aboard and ride to the depths below.  Jon stood regaining his breath.  After a couple of minutes Jon decided to try again.  Grabbing the doors he gave a mighty heave and the doors moved just a fraction of an inch and then slowly closed oblivious to Jon’s he-man efforts to keep them open.  They slowly pushed Jon’s fingers closer and closer as if in a vise with no regard for his pain or efforts.  Finally Jon let go and the doors met.

            Exhausted, sweat dripping from his brow, Jon pondered the situation.  Not being one that could be easily beaten, Jon decided he would open these doors no matter what. Jon reached into his tool belt he was wearing and pulled out an elevator Drop Key also known as a Hoistway Door Unlocking Device or Hoistway Door Unlocking Key Tool.  Inserting it into the small hole near the top of the door, Jon maneuvered the key until it engaged releasing the door locks.  Re-inserting his fingers into the crack between the doors, Jon was able to open them without much difficulty.  As the doors widened, Jon found himself staring at the carpet on the floor of the elevator car.  It was at eye level.  The elevator had begun to ascend again, but then abruptly stopped partway between the second and third floors.  Jon just shook his head.

            Jon couldn’t just climb into the car since it was too high and he didn’t have the strength of youth anymore.  Leaning down, Jon carefully removed his Maglite and shone it down the shaft to the first floor below and into the elevator pit.  Dust, small puddles of oil and grime and litter were scattered at the bottom.  He even noticed a set of car keys. 

            So that’s where those keys the principal Vance had lost went.  I’ll have to tell him.

            Aware that the car could drop any second decapitating him and making more of a mess in the pit below, Jon leaned back and stood up.  Pondering what he should do next, Jon absent-mindedly reached to his hip to insert his flashlight back into its holder.  As he let go of the light, he realized it was not in the holder, but next to it.  But by then it was too late.  His fingers had already let go and a millisecond later his light hit the floor and bounced toward the open elevator door.  Without thinking, Jon lunged for his light before it went over the precipice and in so doing he lost his balance.  Falling forward, Jon grasped thin air and his fingers brushed against the underside of the elevator car just over his head.  As vertigo overtook him, he fell forward into the darkness.  His hands still flailing, Jon was suddenly surprised he wasn’t feeling the results of gravity dragging him downward into the pit.  It only took his mind a split second to realize that he’d somehow grabbed onto some elevator car support underneath that was part of its construction.  It felt like a piece of conduit approximately ¾” in diameter.  He could easily grasp it, but he was hanging in midair with his feet dangling some 25 feet above the bottom of the elevator shaft.  How long he could hang there he didn’t know, but he knew it wouldn’t be that long. 

            Jon thought for a second and then realized that he could probably rock himself back and forth until his swinging feet were high enough to touch the side of the hoistway wall and then he could work his feet up the wall to the opening.  At that point he could probably scoot toward the open door a few more inches giving his feet more flooring to rest on. Once that happened he should be able to carefully feel his way along underneath the bottom of the car and grab any protrusion that would give him somewhat of a handhold until he was able to work his way back out of the shaft. 

            Jon started swinging his feet.  After a few seconds he felt them hit the wall just underneath the open door.  In that split second he also detected a small ledge upon which he could place his feet to get somewhat of a foothold.  On the next arc back, Jon’s feet caught the ledge and he was able to stop swinging.  Now he was hanging like a hammock underneath the elevator car.  Carefully sliding his hands so as not to cut them on some unseen burr, Jon began to make his way toward the opening.  Sweat began to build on his hands making his grip less effective. Fearing the possible outcome and thinking about the 25 foot drop below him, Jon stopped and took a breath to regain his courage.  As he hung there, he carefully twisted his head and looked down.  There, two stories below him, lay his flashlight, shining brilliantly as if saying “Hi there.  Here I am.”

            Resting for just a few seconds, Jon once again began to move.  Then, without any warning, the elevator gave a jerk.  Then another and suddenly it began moving upward dragging Jon with it.  As it neared the top of the shaft, Jon’s body was pulled so that his feet which he had managed to get to the floor below were drug off the edge and dropped him back into a vertical position.  Jon now hung 30 feet above the floor of the pit.  His arms ached and he didn’t know how much longer he could hold on.  The elevator came to an abrupt stop and he heard the doors open. Then he heard voices overhead. 

            As the doors shut, the elevator began to descend.  Jon began to yell but the sound of the moving car, the discussion by those in the car and the exhaust fan running inside the elevator made hearing Jon’s cries for help worthless. 

Over the din of the elevator, Jon could barely make out the voice of Vance the Principal.

…and I was holding my keys when the doors opened and as the new teacher got off she bumped into me knocking them to the floor and down the crack between the elevator car and the floor.  I heard them clank as they hit the bottom a second later. 

Laughter erupted from the other occupants.  Someone asked, “Did you ask your custodian Jon to retrieve them for you?”

The elevator came to an abrupt stop on the second floor and the occupants got off.  The sound of the doors opening and the din of footsteps leaving prevented Jon from hearing the answer.  Then the doors shut and all was quiet again.  Now Jon was really in a bind as he was between floors without any way out at all.  Jon thought about his predicament for a minute and then wondered if this particular hoistway had a service ladder mounted to the wall.  It would be on the opposite side from the doors.  Jon shimmied a little to his left toward the wall.  Then he swung his feet in an arc to try and touch the wall to see if there indeed was a ladder there.  After two or three swings his foot hit the wall.  On the fourth swing his foot hit a rung on a ladder.  Jon’s heart pounded with excitement and he breathed a sigh of relief.

            The fifth swing brought Jon’s foot into contact with the ladder enough that it caught and stayed there.  Now Jon once again looked like a hammock hanging underneath the elevator, but this time on the opposite side.  Jon inched sideways in hopes that he would be able to grab the ladder with his left hand.  Slowly but surely he moved.  As he was about to reach for the ladder, Jon felt a tickle on his face.  This is not the time for an itch, Jon thought.  Then the itch moved.  He felt the tickle move from his cheek, down his face and underneath his nose.  Jon frantically wiggled his nose hoping he could shake loose the itchy feeling.  Then it moved again and Jon realized a small spider was the culprit.

            Jon frantically shook his head and blew air out of his nose in hopes that it would dislodge the spider. However, the more he moved the tighter the spider held on.  All at once the spider scurried upward and into Jon’s left nostril.  Jon blew harder but accomplished nothing.  Panic-stricken, Jon went to take a deep breath to get enough air to blast the spider out of his nose but he absent-mindedly took the breath with his nose.  As he did so he felt the spider disappear into his sinuses.  Jon screamed!

            A terrible itch inside the bridge of Jon’s nose almost made him loose his grip.  Jon’s body shivered with determination, his head shook violently back and forth and his tenacious nose-blowing caused him to hyperventilate.  His mind went woozy and he began to feel dizzy.  Jon stopped to rest his arms now nothing more than numb meat clubs.  Jon waited until his head cleared a little and then gave one good blast again.  As he did so his hands slipped and he fell. 

            Jon expected to feel his body slam into the floor of the hoistway, perhaps even bouncing off the heavy duty springs used to cushion the elevator car in the event of a failure.  As expected, Jon’s back and shoulders slammed hard into what he thought was the floor.  It took him a few seconds to realize that his foot had caught on the ladder rung and he had actually slammed into the ladder on the wall.  Jon was now hanging upside-down facing outward from the wall.  Something tickled the back of his throat.  Jon thought it was a tooth or blood, but then he felt it move.  Horrified, Jon hurled a phlegm ball the size of a wad of chewing gum out of his mouth and to the floor below.  Encased inside was the spider.  Jon gasped, choked and coughed before finally catching his breath. 

            Hanging there momentarily, Jon was finally able to clear his mind enough to realize he could now climb to the bottom of the shaft and rest.  Using all his strength, Jon did a vertical sit-up until his fingers touched the ladder rung.  Slowly, carefully, Jon grasped the cold, dusty, oily rung and maneuvered his body into a climbing position.  His arms still tingled from the lack of blood and his legs felt rubbery, but he was determined to get to the bottom of the ladder and then to find a way out. Jon began to descend.

            As Jon’s feet touched the bottom of the shaft a minute later, a wave of relief swept over him.  Then he noticed how pummeled and sore his body felt.  He picked up his flashlight and shone it around.  He carefully picked up Vance’s keys and purveyed the rest of the floor.  Not much else there other than some garbage, dust, oil, four large springs bolted to the concrete floor at each corner of the shaft and a phlegm-encased non-living arachnid. 

            Jon leaned against the wall and slid down until his butt sat solidly on the floor.  He looked up and shined his flashlight on the elevator car above. 

            Unreal!  I could have died. 

            Jon rested for a full 10 minutes before thinking about how he might get out of this predicament.  Feeling slowly crawled back into his arms and legs and Jon’s mind cleared enough to realize he still had his cellphone.  Reaching into his holster he removed it and illuminated the screen. Even though he was underground some 10 feet, he still had two bars of signal strength.  Jon dialed the main office.  It connected and Abigail, the office secretary, answered, her sweet voice filling the phone with sounds of happiness and joy.  She did that on a regular basis, even during the direst of circumstances.

            Jon explained his situation as Abigail gasped and spread her concern over the phone like butter over bread.  Jon could almost taste her oozing words of worry as she assured him she would get help immediately.  Jon thanked her and hung up, waiting.

            About seven minutes later Jon heard the distant sound of voices and the clanking and clatter of the elevator car being maneuvered and the first floor doors being opened so that he could be extricated from the shaft.  Suddenly a brilliant light shone in his face and a booming voice echoed off the hoistway walls reaching Jon’s dusty ears.

            Jon, are you okay?

            Yes, just very sore.

            We’ll have you out shortly. 

            A few minutes later two firefighters were helping Jon to his feet.  They secured some ropes and a harness to him and lifted him carefully out of the first floor doorway. As Jon’s eyes grew accustomed to the bright light, they suddenly focused on Red, a large firefighter Jon had worked with, or perhaps it’s better to say, dealt with on numerous occasions before.

            Glad you’re okay, Red said in a baritone voice.

Me too, Jon replied sheepishly in a voice higher than he intended as he continued to stare at the floor.

Could’ve happened to anyone, Red said, although Jon could hear in his voice that

it really couldn’t have. 

The firefighters put Jon on a gurney to take him in just to make sure he was okay.  As he rolled out the door and toward the ambulance, Vance walked up.

Glad you’re okay Jon. 

Me too.  Jon’s face was red with embarrassment.

Hey, you didn’t happen to find…

Jon held Vance’s keys out to him before he could finish his sentence. 

Wow!  Thanks. 

Vance reached out to take them from Jon as Jon let them fall into Vance’s hand.  Vance watched, as if in slow motion, as they completely missed his hand and

disappeared down the drain alongside the curb.  Jon heard them clank and then hit the bottom of the drain and as his eyes rose like the sun in the east to meet Vance’s eyes, he realized what he was going to be doing when he came back to work the next day.